Category: family

I’m Happy For Two Reasons

1) Because I just read the following quote: “Feed a man a fish and he’ll eat for a day. Feed a fish a man and he’ll eat for weeks.”

2) I’m a Mormon.

Yes it’s a truth: as I ponder why it is that in general I, Curtis, am such a happy person, I realize that it is directly linked to my religion. “How!?” you may be questioning exclamatorily right now. Well, dearest you, let me tell you. And, as you might’ve guessed by now, I like doing things in list form, so here goes (to mix things up a bit I’ll make this list out of letters).

A) I have purpose in my life. I know why I’m here, where I came from, and what comes after death. Knowing that there’s a reason I’m here on this giant sphere hurtling through the immensity of space gives me a sense of peace and joy.

B) I have a loving family. Mormon doctrine teaches that the family is “ordained of God” and “central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children.” (“The Family: A Proclamation to the World”) I love my fam and find tremendous happiness in knowing that I can be with them for all eternity.

C) “Adam fell that men might be, and men are that they might have joy.” (2 Nephi 2:25) This verse from the Book of Mormon let’s me know that it is God’s plan for me to be happy. The Supreme Being’s object and desire is for me and each of us to be happy! We are meant to be happy in this life and the next, how could it be any other way?

D) And one of the best Biblical verses ever penned (quilled?): “These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33) I know Christ lives and that He loves each of us. No matter how dark the path may seem or how difficult the way, there is a Light to guide us safely through. Now there’s a reason to rejoice.

Mormon Women Part II – Division of Labor

“The Family: A Proclamation to the World” states some basic and essential things about the roles of women and men. “By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children.”

Women are endowed with the capacity to love, nurture, protect, feel, serve, obey, beautify, and charm. It is in our mitochondria from all the way back to Eve. Men are ordained and set apart to hold the priesthood. This calling and ordination gives them the power to serve, protect, lift, discern, organize, preach, prophesy, bless and heal. Both callings make us humble. Both callings cause us to be selfless. Both callings allow Christ to build his kingdom on the earth through his servants. A division of labors is absolutely necessary in order to build the kingdom within the lives of each member from childhood on (women) and to organize it locally and globally (men).

Heavenly Father has designed the work of women and men to complement each other and to build on each other. It is as though women are in charge of making sure that each building block is strong, whole and dependable, and the men are in charge of overseeing the organization of those blocks into a church and a kingdom. Neither one would get very far without the other, and when men and women work together to build the kingdom in such a way, they succeed.

Women are just as important as men, and men are just as important as women. We are equal in the sight of God, though our roles on earth differ. “[We must be] ready and prepared to function as a full partner in a celestial team–without having to look up because of any feeling of inferiority, or look down because of any feeling of superiority, but look across into the eyes of an equally prepared, equally magnificent eternal mate.” (Ida Smith. “The Lord as a Role Model for Men and Women.” Ensign, August 1980, 4.)

Mormon Women

I love being a woman in the LDS church. I feel totally liberated and understood.

Some sections of society look upon LDS women with pity – they want to come and free us from our “brain-washed bondage.” Not only do I not need any intervention from “those who know better”, I don’t want it.

This is a church that celebrates women. It follows the example of Christ in loving, respecting and honoring women. Jesus first appeared to Mary, after His resurrection; his last instructions on the cross were for the well-being of his mother; He taught women as much as He taught men. His gospel is good news to EVERYONE – men, women and children, from all over the world, and His church plays no favorites. Women are just as much welcome to His love and salvation as men are, and that is one reason why I feel liberated as an LDS woman.

Another reason is that I am allowed and expected to be a woman; to do things that women enjoy doing. Deep down in the hearts of most women, they want to be home, with their children, nurturing and teaching them how to be contributing members of society. Financial obligations and social pressures make this very difficult for the majority of women in the world–but living an ole’ fashioned family life is something that LDS women are encouraged to do. Does this make us slaves in the kitchen? No. It just allows us to become unfettered by the social chains that demand that we “contribute” to society (all the while letting other people raise our children without any investment in their well-being). I’ve worked in an office. I’ve taught school. I’ve planned conferences and made travel arrangements and handled logistics and gone to fancy dinners (that I had to plan) and it does not even compare to being a mother. There is nothing as rewarding as loving and caring for a baby (or two) every day. Sure, I don’t sleep as much as I’d like, and I just got peed on while in the process of writing this blog. My shirt is often covered with baby-fluids, and my life has revolved around a 3-hour schedule for the last year, but I am so happy. I don’t dread anything in my day–no presentations, no ornery co-workers, no long boring meetings, no disrespectful teenagers and no tech malfunctions that put everything on hold. I find so much satisfaction in watching my son learn to walk and talk (and growl, thanks to his Dad), pick up food and feed himself, notice things around him and get excited about his toys. It can’t be explained, but it is wonderful. Trust me.

Not all LDS women stay home with kids, of course, and that is fine too. Many women work and enjoy it, and they are in total compliance with the church as well. Liberating, isn’t it? We can choose what we want to do, but we are encouraged to do what we have been pre-programmed to enjoy. Families are strong, marriages are strong, people are happy–all doing exactly what God put us here to do.

Those who demand that women have a career may think that the only way to have equal respect is to have identical roles. This approach is like putting a thick and juicy steak and a flaky, delicious fresh peach pie in a blender so that one flavor will not dominate over the other – A well-cooked steak is just as satisfying as a well-prepared pie! (From the perspective of one who would prefer a pie to a steak). Grinding up steak and pie together would ruin the meal — the texture would be lost, the flavor combinations, the distinct tastes. These attributes make them unique, but they do not make one superior over the other. Likewise, putting men and women in a societal blender would not only not work, it would ruin the balance that we need.

Liberating.